What does it really mean to forgive?

For some it is straight forward but for others its not so clear.
Does it mean you forgive the action of their transgression but you will never forget or trust them again?
Or does it mean you forgive the transgression and give them the benefit of the doubt that they will never repeat the offense?

Or does it mean you will forgive but they must work at proving themselves trustworthy?

 

 

f0r me .....

 

when I feel that I have forgiven it means that I have eliminated any anger or desire for revenge. I have “let go”. I don’t need to see justice done to the person. It’s not so much for the other person, it’s for me so that I don’t have to carry around a bunch of negative junk. I never do tend to bring up past issues, that’s just not how I roll, but I THINK about them a lot.

That being said, it doesn’t necessarily mean that I give them the benefit of the doubt. That would depend upon the person, and the circumstances. Sometimes people have temporary lapses in judgment and behave in atypical ways. When the bulk of my experience with the individual is positive, I might feel comfortable trusting them again. And eventually I might forget.

If the person has shown me a history of similar behavior, I do not forget, and I am wary of any further opportunities the person may have to hurt me again.

Forgiveness means that you would not wish for revenge nor have any negative feelings towards the person that wronged you. You could, however; know that the person might do the same wrong to you again, and therefore try to use caution the next time around .. 

By being cautious you are being perfectly wise and yet you can still have no feelings of anger or revenge for the person. Forgiveness is a wise action, but being blind to danger could result in a negative outcome. Forgiveness is NOT meant to put you at risk, but it is guaranteed to free your mind and give you peace ....

~ Deciding whether or not to trust a person is like deciding whether or not to climb a tree, because you might get a wonderful view from the highest branch, or you might simply get covered in sap ~